In a whole different direction

Voila! An update!

So from here on out, I should give you a heads up: I will no longer be posting about the Peace Corps. If you want to know more about that, read my old posts and get your fill but I'm back in America, so it's on to USA things!

Which I say, but will now be contradicting entirely. But first, a little background about me:

For the past few months I've been back home, I've been dealing with my weight. Yea, yea- it's old news (a girl concerned about her weight? Boo hoo! Yea well, shut your face.) but having spent a lot of time trying really hard to not eat every potato in Peru, I'm suddenly overwhelmed by healthy food and life choices. It's brilliant.

And yet, my health now and my health a year ago are not at all different. I'm not sick, but I'm overweight. I work out consistently (doing a Warrior Dash this Saturday! Woot!), eat mostly protein with lots of fruits and veggies, partake in refined sugars every once in a while but not to a gluttonous extreme, and drink copious amounts of water. At my last check up, the doctors gave me standing ovations (not really, but I was told that my blood oxygen level was basically perfect so that's something). So what the HELL, body?!

I've always been pretty chubby, ballooned out around high school, and got it under control in college. I've played sports in high school (varsity tennis), college (club rugby), and was a gym rat the year before peace corps. In Peru, I ran an off road half marathon, a few lovely 10kms, and participated in the Guinness World Book of Record's longest raft race down the Amazon for 3 days of paddling a gigantic, unwieldy raft built by hand.

And still, my weight hasn't moved. Not up. Not down. Just chilling like NBD.

So I tried a bunch of diets (military diet, juice detox, banana diet, korean detox juice/soup diet, etc) to no avail. The last hardcore diet diet where I actually lost weight (nearly 20lbs) was during college, but it involved eating only chicken breasts and bell peppers for months, and I was injected with some mysterious concoction that to this day, I have no idea what it was... (maybe that's why my body's so frustratingly stable? New, uber lame super power?). Let's just say, it was probably horrible and yet I was totally willing to give it a try.

Why? You ask... I assume.

Why indeed. Well, to be quite frank, I've never stopped to ask myself that. Mostly because at this point in my life, being overweight and picked on for it is sort of... my norm. If you're not overweight, maybe you can relate to some level through some other visible defect of sorts that the oh so bright children of the future learn to hone in on and pick at with shovels (John Mulaney, anyone?). Plus, I'm Korean.

Now, if you're not Korean, this is also something that might be news. Peruvians aren't that different, I guess. But physical appearances, in the states, are things we don't generally point out in matter of fact ways. Peruvians will greet each other based on physical appearance (hola gordito: hey fatty, que tal flaquita: what's up skinny) but it's generally said with affection, even though a north american might get a bit offended. Koreans do the backhanded compliment. You have no idea how often I hear, "you would be so pretty if you were skinny!" and "lose those last few pounds, and the boys will be all over you!" to which I respond by laughing or smiling and for some reason, thanking them.

It's weird. I know.

But let's be honest, I've been growing up with this forever and it just doesn't bother me anymore, but it's pretty much ingrained into my whole being. When I was younger, I actively fought against it. I was extremely shy, very introverted, and made friends with books and not people because people were the worst. In high school, I joined tennis and started to make friends, grew gregarious and confident, and getting picked on for my weight wasn't happening as much anymore- and when it did, I got really good at fighting back. It's probably why I went into psychology in college- I was really good at finding that one thing someone else was insecure about, and heckling them with a very well placed jab of my sharp tongue. But I ate whatever I wanted and when my mom would once again warn me against eating another slice of bread because tsk tsk that's fattening, I would stare at her and shove 2 pieces in my mouth, because bread is delicious damn it.

In college, I had more control over what I was eating and holy take out, batman- I was loving the food! Brie stuffed french toast, pad thai with shrimp, mushroom calzones, and so much more! I'm a big proponent of everything in moderation, and so that's exactly what I did but every once in a while, I undertook a few eating challenges and I'm pretty proud of how well I was able to keep up (to a point).

Anyway, I went to Peru where my food choices dwindled but I managed to haggle a deal with my host mom so that I'd at least have a serving of vegetables 5 out of 7 days of the week. I got back to the US, tried a few more diets in the past few months and nothing (or I'd lose 2lbs and immediately gain them back the next day if I ate anything different from the prescribed list of foods).

So my mother, who has always pushed me to lose weight (she was and is one of those moms, but now I choose to think it's for my health, and not because she's a crazy korean woman obsessed with weight as much as South Korea as a nation is obsessed with weight and being thin. She probably is, but I love her anyway), she mentioned that someone she knows went to this clinic because she had diabetes and wanted to improve her condition and she lost over 20lbs in a month or so and blah blah blah.

My immediate reaction was, holy CRAP! That's so unhealthy! She's going to yo-yo and it's not going to be good. My second reaction was... I wonder if it'd work for me? I mean, years of evidence have shown that weight loss does not come easy to my body. I am a rock, a stable beacon for mass, the thing by which weight stability is measured by.

So after talking a bit, we decide to check out the clinic together. I go in and am immediately wary. The doctors explain the program, but I had to pull teeth to get the details. It's freakin crazy expensive (like, I could buy a round trip flight to Peru and live there comfortable for another year expensive), so I'm wondering why all of this isn't being told to me. They basically tell me that chances are good I'll lose weight, but there's no guarantee. Basically, they're telling me to drop a load of cash at their feet and have faith. I'm like... what is this, scientology? Hell to the NO. Give me details. After an hour or two of me trying to understand what's being said, how everything is broken down, what the plan and "treatments" are, I excuse them to chat with my mom. We go back and forth and finally I decide- what the heck. I made a bet with my mom that if I could lose 20lbs, she'd buy me a puppy. This way, I'm doing this program that involves 3 months of intermittent acupuncture (to ears, stomach, and apparently legs/ankles), heat lamps, these suction cup things that are hilarious (they suction cup sections of your stomach, hips, and thighs and I think it's to stimulate them but I'm not sure), some sort of scrapping (didn't do this one today, so I'm not sure), 2 weeks of a juice detox where I'll be drinking a diluted fermented juice from the Tahara company, and following up with lots and lots of maintenance where they'll be constantly checking my percentage body fat, weight, bmi, etc.

I've never put too much faith in eastern medicine. I mean, I think a lot of it works but more for maintaining than curing. I don't know why I think that, but I do. And I think the doctors were a little annoyed at me by my constant string of questions (which I refuse to apologize for. I'm shelling out this much cash, the least they can do is answer some damn questions. Plus, don't call yourself a doctor if you're not going to encourage your patients to question and understand.) buuuuuuttt whatever.

So I'll be updating you more on what the heck is going on, what I'm eating, and what my activity is like.

I started today and was given my first (out of 12) treatment of acupuncture to my belly and ankles, and the suction cup things (seriously. I could not stop giggling the entire time these were on me, and burst into laughter when they removed it cause of the sucky sound it made. My mom disapproved of my reaction, but I'm ticklish and it couldn't be helped!)

Starting tomorrow, I begin 3 days of pre-fast, which means I can drink lots of water, eat fruits and vegetables, tofu and fish, but nothing else- no seasoning, no oil, nada nada... I should have asked about seeds. Eh, I'll leave them for now and return to them in another month or so.

The intense part of the program is only a month long, followed by 2 months of check-ins for maintenance. We'll see how this goes and I'll post daily (albeit, probably much shorter passages than this. Sorry for the giant bio!) if you're interested.

Sincerely,
Sue

NOTE: According to the machine that does all the percentage body fat and numbers and things, I apparently should lose 32lbs. However, I was fully clothed in cold weather clothes, and had literally had a meal less than an hour before so this number is questionable. None the less, I'm aiming for it just to see what happens.