day 50: bullfighting

so i discovered that watching animals die for sport is not something that i enjoy.

my emotions are currently locked in a battle that is resulting in a mild stomachache. on the one hand, i appreciate that this is a tradition, a part of a culture that i am here to experience. on the other hand, animals are being tortured and killed for merriment and applause.

there were 4 bulls that were killed, and i stayed for all of them. the first 2 went quickly and i was able to appreciate the culture of it all. that, and the drunks chucking beer bottles before being quickly escorted out by 15 other people were interesting to watch. then 2 clowns played with a young bull, baiting it and what not but letting it live. the 3rd and 4th bulls though...

bull 3 held its own. it had been speared a few times but had managed to run out of harms way, the sword refusing to pierce its skin. people in the stands waved white cloths, napkins, and toilet paper to signify their want to save this valiant bull. the bullfighter ignored their please. whistles and calls became frantic and pleading, but to no avail. the final stab brought the bull down, much to the distress of the people.

bull 4 was a feisty one and i had high hopes when it slammed into the bullfighter, running him over. the bullfighter was unharmed, however, and after playing with the bull for a bit, he brought down his sword, the angle of which resulted in blood spewing from the bull's mouth and nostrils. the dust was being kicked up, and all was illuminated by one, bright halogen bulb. as the dust settled, the silhouette of the bull, blood flowing freely, down on its knees, remained illuminated when suddenly the lights dimmed and all i could see were the shapes of those in the stands, the lights of the band behind them casting shadows and rays of light catching dust.

the entire time, i just kept wishing i had a camera that could capture the tragedy of the moment. i could see the perfect shot in my head but my point and shoot cam could never do any of it justice. the juxtaposition of a man in tight, shiny clothes, standing so proudly before a young bull, blood foaming from its mouth, its eyes rolling wildly in their sockets. how he felt pride in this moment, i couldn't understand. how difficult is it to kill a wounded, frightened animal? was this a moment of pride over conquering his human emotions of empathy? of completing a tradition that he had been trained in? i just didn't understand.

the audience confused me as well. wild feminine screams of fear resounded beside me as women cowered each time the bull charged at the bullfighter. drunk men shouted encouragements at the bull, at the bullfighter, at the women. i couldn't understand why half of them were there, why they would bring their children to witness such tortures and yet, had i grown up in this culture, would i have been any different? do i feel the way i do simply because i grew up in another environment?

i've heard people argue that animal torture is wrong, no matter if it's tradition or not, and i am inclined to agree. at the same time, i have to ask just how much these same people are pushing their own ideals and beliefs on to a different culture. we call things "wrong" when they don't agree with our own ideas. so who am i to say bullfighting is wrong, when it seems everyone in the stands would agree that it is i who is wrong to believe what i believe?

day 49: fiestas patrias

'sup amigos

it's been fiestas patrias for a few days now- peru's day of independence that coincides with santa eulalia's founding.

so of course, it's party time in the streets for 4 solid days.

we got thursday and friday off to celebrate with the family and to do some more diagnostics of our current city, to practice for the first 3 months on site, which meant i ate so much food, i question the size of my stomach relative to the other organs in my body. i'm pretty sure parts of my other organs have decided to ban together with the stomach to create one mega-stomach. i only really need one lung and one kidney, in the end.

i also went camping at this park. can i just say, i did not enjoy sleeping in the tent made for couples? there were 7 of us, and 2 tents that would fit 2 ppl snugly. maximum. so i ended up staying up all night, trying to not pass out (read: i failed many times) and went to sleep in the tent come morning.

yes, i did come home from this trip and immediately go to bed for a solid 9 hours. awesome.

but today? today i watched a no rules horse race. yea. it started at the top of one mountain side, across towards the other side, and down. horse races are amazing and thankfully, no one was dreadfully hurt this year as they had been years before, but that's mostly because they decided to end the race prior to what they called "la curva," or "the curve" where in previous years had lead to heads and horses being slammed against pointy rocks. erp durp.

still, the caballeros who decided to have a glass or 2 of liquid courage prior to the race found themselves thrown onto dirt paths and more pointy rocker. mmm... well done, boys. well done.

oh! and a few aspirantes ran a race yesterday. i believe they had all believed it to be an easy 4 or so mile race, only to find themselves still running past the 7 mile mark. but congratulations to one volunteer who won 2nd place!! i believe she will be throwing a wee bit of a fiesta with her prize money, but that's more likely chisme than truth. only because i just made that up right now.

tomorrow is the day i will watch some torros die :( sad, but i do want to watch it simply for the experience. i doubt i'll ever watch it again because watching animals die doesn't seem like fun. if anything, it seems sad. but i said i wanted to experience perú and even if this is part of the culture that i don't agree with, i will be able to at least say that i've seen it and have reason for disagreeing with it.

also, i have tons of laundry. can i just say, i don't enjoy doing laundry? i didn't like it in the states, and it's worse here because i have to do it by hand. a load of laundry takes like 3hours to do on my own. but i love love love it when my host mom helps me and things go more quickly.

now i'm going to eat a coveted piece of chocolate i brought from the states (a twix. om nom nom) and sit around, wishing i had friends who would write to me (THIS IS ME STARING FIXEDLY IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION) because i have yet to receive a single letter or package since being away. can you feel my jealousy at other aspirated who are weighed down with 8 or 9 packages filled with goodies and love? because it's a pretty dangerous stare. the drooling probably doesn't help.

peace.

day 43: ANCASH IS BETTER

so this week was insane in the membrane. all of us went to field based training and my TAPs group got lucky and landed in ancash.

can i just say, i've been hoping to be stationed in ancash since week 3?
so i'm really hoping that's gonna happen because this week basically confirmed that i'm in love with the sierra. i mean, to be honest, i don't give a number 7 where i get placed, but i absolutely loved my time there. let's do a quick recap of what happened this week.

SATURDAY NIGHT/SUNDAYwent to lima, got onto a sweet bus with a reclining seat, passed out and woke up to see ANCASH out my window. awesome. had a panel of volunteers show up and do a q&a session. ran around huaraz on a scavenger hunt and discovered that my favorite ice cream flavor is currently holding at maracuya (passionfruit).

MONDAY

taught english at the PCV's site and ate cuy. CUY I SAY! that's right, i

saw some dead giant rodents and then ate them.

let's pretend i said that in a really awesome way that made that sound delicious. like... the PCV's host family prepared a dish known as "cuy," a cultural highlight that is a quintessential peruvian dish involving home raised guinea pigs, fed on the tears of unicorns and fairy dust, which are then lulled to sleep by 100 crickets synchronizing to beethoven's symphony number 293847234. they are then dressed and fried to a golden crisp, placed on a bed of potatoes from the garden of Eden and devoured.

TUESDAY
went to tumpa and taught kids to wash their hands!

the song goes:

lava tus manos (lava tus manos)
antes de comer (antes de comer)
entre de los dedos (entre de los dedos)
para buena salud (para buena salud)

sing to the tune of frere jacques

later went to amashca to another site and played volleyball (note to self: los payasos en la casa!!!)/sociodrama (nts: huahua) which was amazing. can i just say, i'm falling in love with sociodramas? play acting is so much fun, especially when you just do it with reckless abandon. that's what she said. also, i'm getting so much better at volleyball! but i'd rather improve my soccer skills and i think it would be a test of my ability if i could kick the ball around without having to stare at my feet. it's no fun running into people/things because i can't figure out how to dribble and look around at the same time.

also, i went running in the morning and 5 minutes in this altitude results in me gasping for air like a fish out of water. it feels amazing.

WEDNESDAY
went to caraz and stayed there for 2 nights. i believe this was the day we did pasos adelante with the parents at another PCV's site and it was truly inspiring. more sociodramas, of course, but it was 3 hours long and felt like way less. time really does fly wh

en you cram as much as you can possibly do during one meeting. seriously though, i was crazy inspired. and then later that night, we went on a crazy ferris wheel of caged hamster ball death.

yea. go ahead and let that marinate in your head a little bit. got it? it was exactly what you're thinking.

THURSDAY

went to my PC mentor's site and did an amazing sociodrama cause the electricity went out and she couldn't show the video she has originally planned to do. turned out to be the greatest thing ever. once i get the video, i will post it. watch and be amazed.

FRIDAY

got to see other PCV's site and played with a bunch of kids! so cute! but before that, this was the day i completed an ancash tradition of jumping into a glacial lake. except who has time to pack for such an occasion? so clothes came off and BAM. freezing water. it actually wasn't that bad, once the numbing took hold, and it really was a gorgeous view. unfortunately, i took my wet underwear and put it in a bag. yes, this did mean i went commando for the rest of the day, but what sucked is that when we got out of the combi (basically, a big bus van), i left the bag behind by accident :( sad face, indeed.

sorry, underwear adventure wasn't as exciting as you may have imagined, but i was sad because i only have so many articles of clothing and losing them makes me sad. but now it's weird because a combi guy has my underwear... womp womp. awkward.

SATURDAY

last day in ancash. SO SAD. went around to different universities with a group of youth and basically did what most people do in the states- sit around and listen to colleges give their talks about their universities and their stats, and get brochures and some free pens. it was interesting to learn about the school system in peru because it's rather different from the states.

for example, when i tell people that i studied psychology in school, many people believe i am a psychologist because that's how it is here. you study for roughly 5 years and you receive your license and what not to become a psychologist. the system is much more focused, right off the bat, on what it is that you plan on doing. it's interesting but i have to keep explaining to people that i can't work as a psychologist, diagnosing people, because i am NOT a psychologist.

TODAY

so i'm pretty sure a lot of those aren't the days that things actually occurred, but it's all good. i'm in love with ancash, i've got a bit of quechua learned, and more than anything: i'm so inspired by all the PCVs and their projects, i can't friggin wait until i'm on site and doing something with my life.

peace.

day 34: when sue song starts to lose her cool...

ugh, i'm the worst. last night, i snapped at a bunch of kids because they were roughhousing after the 4th time i told them to please listen. the day before that, i was such a poophead and left a game night at one of the PCT's place early so i could get some work done/sleep. then this afternoon, i used my angry voice at all the other PCTs when people started to get a bit rowdy about our souvenirs. now i just feel terrible because i'm being such a jerk to people and i can't figure out why i've been so short tempered as of late.

le sigh.

on happier news, there was a transportation strike last wednesday so we got the day off to do some work, which meant i spent a lot of time with family and ended up at the pool where the water is freezing. FREEZING. like an iceberg. no joke. it literally hurt to put my feet in, so of course i went in anyway and swam. awesome.

and even better, i'm heading to ANCASH next week!!! we have field based training where we visit current volunteers to see what they're doing and to participate ourselves. i'm so excited, i just might explode from sheer joy. plus, a part of me really really wants to be placed in ancash for my 2 years in peru, predominately because it's freakin gorgeous and quechua is spoken in ancash! but in all honesty, i don't really care too much where i'm placed because i know i'm going to have a freakin blast.

damn, the peace corps is freakin awesome. btw, dear readers, if you happen to not be a PCT, i would highly suggest considering it in your future <3

now, i am about to go to another party in the calle (street) because every other day seems to be a celebration of some patron saint or teacher day or an inauguration or something and the music blasting until 5am just makes you think, "if you can't beat em, join em"

also, mi mama anfitriona is about to put clothes on the dogs because she says it's winter and cold out for them. i'm going to go watch that happen, especially with the big dog (named Stone) who lives on the roof and barks at ppl and other dogs.

chau for now!

day 30: wouldn't it be awesome...

there's a new game that was made up on our trek up to see some ruins and a mini waterfall last saturday called "wouldn't it be awesome..." in which you complete said phrase with something awful. for example, on this trek, there was a lot of donkey fecal matter. like a lot. you couldn't walk for more than a minute before finding your path littered with kaka de burro.

so you say:

"wouldn't it be awesome if this entire mountain was made of poop and you had to roll down it?"

2 PCTs came up with this game based on another PCT. it's the greatest game ever.

in other news, i found out there's a pool that costs a few soles to get in. i went with my family and some other PCTs and had a nice time. it also has a small animal farm where i poked an alpaca. let me tell you, i wish i had an alpaca for a pet cause those things are dirty but soft as what i imagine clouds feel like.

speaking of other news, i'll be going to ANCASH next week for field based training!!! 2 other groups are heading to la libertad and piura but mine is heading up to ancash, and i hope i love it because this is secretly where i'm kind of hoping to be placed. quechua is spoken in ancash; it's the native, oral language spoken in peru and i would love to learn it someday. but first, i will be working on my castellano because i was just recently put into language medium-medium, which simply means that i have reached the most basic level that all PCTs must reach prior to entering their sites.

of course, i would like to improve as i still have trouble with my conjugations but this will all come in due time.

there is a lot more to write and i wish i could chat for longer, but i have not stopped being exhausted and i'm about to skip my homework to go to bed. i will do my homework while wolfing down food at breakfast tomorrow. i admit to this freely and if any of the language facilitators are reading this.... please don't tell me teacher. pretty please <3

Day 24: Recap o' the Week

wwwwoooooaaahhhh. days fly by when you don't have internet to waste your life on. yea, long story short- the modem died and we had to wait a few days for the tech guy to come by and fix it but huzzah! it's fixed!

so let's see what went on these past few days!

1. last wednesday was my host sister's birthday! started the day with a quick meeting with my youth group before heading back to the house to help prepare CEVICHE. so awesome. my host grandpa is an amazing chef and he had me and my cousin/other PCT (i feel like all the PCTs are related in some way or another...) help him cut the fish, garlic, ginger, peppers, etc, add random spices from small plastic packages, cut and squeeze limes and oranges, and etc. before putting it all together to create awesome deliciousness in my mouth.

later that night, i made cheesecake. there are no graham crackers and no sour cream so i substituted and gave up on measuring things and left it cooking in the oven for about 2 hours (the oven does not allow you a specific temp, only a broken knob that reads "high" and "low." so bake at 350F? yea, shut up recipe, you don't know anything.)

whatever. cheesecake turned out tasting like cheesecake and that made me happy! plus, a bunch of PCTs and the whole family were down in the big room and we danced for a long time. learned some new dances that i can't do because i'm an uncoordinated mess, but watching my grandpa dance with my grandma to some crazy pop song was just too good for words.

2. thursday was the day of our first youth group in our community and it turned out better than i thought. for us youth development volunteers, practice is key and we were told that we needed to practice planning/forming/evaluating during these 3 months of training. this makes a ton of sense, except that none of it is sustainable and all of it is extremely stressful when you think of how very little time any of us have to actually prepare. for example- during our 2 years of service, we spend the first 3 months getting to know the community, to understand its needs and figure out what the community wants from us before we begin any projects that are meant to be sustainable. during our 10 weeks of training, we have less than 7 of those weeks to find youth, plan activities and discussions that cover the 3 goals of our program, and we need to meet with these youth 3-5 times before we leave. yea... not a perfect system but whaddya gonna do?

3. friday was the day of our YD skit. the group i'm in put our spanish skillz into use to create skits that we then present to the rest. our skit was on saying no to drugs and basically how to say you want to use a condom when your partner disagrees. both of them were hysterical and informative, if i say so myself. especially the condom one, which was acted out by 2 others in my group and consisted of one saying things like, "just this one time!" or "but condoms are messy and they smell weird" and the other responding, "once is all it takes!" or "sex is like that"

yea. hysterical.

afterwards, we went to our PCVC (coordinator)'s parents' house for a party of sorts. we had american food (hot dogs, hamburgers) but i was all about the guac, yo. that guac was freakin amazing and it showed. for the most part, all the PCTs ate like they had been starved for weeks. i, for example, would have eaten the guac with my hands had i not held onto some form of propriety and used a spoon to shovel it onto my plate. where it was promptly eaten using my hands. and chips. but mostly hands. we had a great time just talking, sharing a few dinamicas (small ice breaker games and other sorts that YD must always have in the back of their minds that facilitate teaching certain concepts to youth) and eating.

4. saturday was a trip to lima to see programa educadores de calle, which is a program that helps children living in the streets. it's rather heartbreaking, realizing that children can't be children. what's great about this program is that it accepts any child they can get a hold of. for many of them, it's having a place to go after school to do homework and receive help rather than spending those hours with their family, helping sell predominately produce. my guess is that many of them leave the program to go work but at least at this time, they are given a few hours to enjoy their youth and to continue their education. there're also sports things, which i went to go see. again, i had a blast but it was sad to know what these kids live through. their lives, their education, drugs and sex. it's pretty devastating but it's programs like this that help give me hope!

saturday, btw, was also 'dia del amigo' or 'friend day' and what a day! not only did i go to lima, where i spent the vast majority (read: all) of the spending money given to us every few days (i had a lot of food. food food food. like pinkberry. fro yo up in this place, what? awesome) but i also went out to dance at a club! it was kind of awful because the club was PACKED and i was sweating like a crazy mofo but it was really interesting to note the social similarities between clubs here and those in the US.

for example: if you're a girl, you will wait 15-20 minutes in order to use the bathroom. and it doesn't matter where you are, there will always be a few girls who are just rude and make the bathrooms their temporary homes, holing up in there for a solid 5-10 minutes only to emerge with fresh makeup and a cup of freakin tea (not really. but COME ON. you don't go to the bathroom to chat with your friend, you go in there to pee. that's IT. anything more and you are going to walk through a gauntlet of glares and muttering curses from a line of 10 other girls waiting behind you.)

another one: if you're a girl, doesn't matter what you wear or what you're doing, guys will want to dance with you and some of them may get too bold. at this point, go to the bathroom. it will give you 15-20 minutes of away time, during which they will hopefully move on to some other person. if not, at least you will have some distraction as the 2 girls emerge from the single toilet bathroom to the glares and mutterings of the others in line.

i went to the club, btw, with my sis (older sis, not younger), her bf, my PCT cousin AND A NEW PCV COUSIN! woo! she came to visit her host fam (aka, my aunt and uncle) this weekend and i got to meet her! basically, she's awesome. she played rugby. that kind of lets her jump from neutral to amazing in an instant. she's working in water and sanitation down in nazca right now and just talking to her had me really excited about my future in PC again :D huzzah!

5. finally, monday was the 4th of july! our classes and meetings were pushed aside for the day, to spend time with the small business development group joining the youth development group for a day of american things, like burgers (meh) and hot dogs (well, hot dogs in burger buns) and football (american). we went to a place with some grass and 2 alpacas! ALPACAS! they were the craziest looking things ever and one of my friends decided that the big, brownish shaggy one was reminiscent of an eewok. hilarious.

pues, that's all for now! if i can think of anything else that happened today, i'll let you know.

hope all is well back in the states! and here's a little peruvian tip: always keep toilet paper in your pocket. ALWAYS. because most public bathrooms will not have it. except try to remember to take them out when you're doing laundry (by hand).

also, no- you do not flush toilet paper. and yes- you will forget this the first few days and curse yourself when you're staring at the tp you just dropped in the toilet by habit. don't worry about it right now, but stop it cause you're gonna piss off some sanitation ppl.

chau!